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Tuna Man (12/25/2009)
JT (12/25/2009)
Tuna Man (12/25/2009)<SPAN id=_ctl1_ctlTopic_ctlPanelBar_ctlTopicsRepeater__ctl1_lblFullMessage>After an enjoyable evening with many friends, I know it was a good time because the cops showed up. Well after socializing with both my male and female friends, I broke the news. So before the "rumors" begin to spread, I figured I would get a head start on the rumor mill. I was drunk, (go figure) and well I am going to come clean. The meaning behind my boat name and my screen name is not fishing related. Bowed up is my favorite position, I like to take it from the back side. Dont get me wrong, I enjoy the female sex every now and again, but for the most part, I prefer the pole not the hole.



So there it is, I said it first myself, I have opened and come out of the closet. I admit I am homosexual.



I hope the friendships I have developed through the years will not be affected by this post, but I felt it was time to come clean. After 50 years, what do I have to lose.



Thanks for all the memories, this forum has been a blessing in so many ways.



Norm



http://pensacolafishingforum.com/fishingforum/Topic67744-12-1.aspx?Highlight=closet


that would make you bisexual. lol


The post was a spoof..During the party, Norm had left his PC on...We have some deranged people on here.


i knew it was considering it was on this particular topic, and the wording helped a little too.
 

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Dave still cries about me shooting him in the leg with that red ryder. I think that was after one of the first Panhandle bashes. Wasnt it at the golf courseclubhouse next to your place?
 

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hardcorehare (12/25/2009)from the old forum the madmax thread with the blowup doll and then the "buttplug" thread...i still remember so u know it was some great stuff...:)
oh ya forgot about that one........ laughing my butt of again just thinking about it... man i miss the tiki bar
 

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For me it would be a thread about one of Capt. Ken's stories talking about eating chili for a week and farting all through the supermarket. I have tried to find it with no success.
 

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Neptune calls me "Daddy"
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Linda'a dogs...



Mike in West Virginny



PS... though it might have been my idea, I think it was our humble host Chris who photoshoppe..., er... "developed that picture.

This one generally gets me in trouble...



ANY of Karon's "fishing reports" will always put a smile on my face:letsparty:letsparty:letsparty

And that guy a couple years ago who got "blue balls" while trying to subdue a green cobia on his boat was the best single fishing story I've read on this board...

I wish I could find that one...

Redfish Regatta tales are always fun...

Jim
 

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jim t (12/27/2009)

...And that guy a couple years ago who got "blue balls" while trying to subdue a green cobia on his boat was the best single fishing story I've read on this board...

I wish I could find that one...

Jim
I REMEMBER THAT!! I wish I could find it that shit was hilarious!
 

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SKEETER (12/26/2009)For me it would be a thread about one of Capt. Ken's stories talking about eating chili for a week and farting all through the supermarket. I have tried to find it with no success.


Found it!!!!, and it was as funny as the first time I read it.





I went grocery shopping recently while not being altogether sure that

course of action was a wise one. You see, the previous evening I had

prepared and consumed a massive quantity of my patented "You're

definitely going to $h!t yourself" chili. Tasty stuff, albeit hot to

the point of being painful, which comes with a written guarantee from

me that if you eat the next day both of your a$$ cheeks WILL fall off.



Here's the thing. I had awakened that morning, and even after two

cups of coffee (and all of you know what I mean) nothing happened.

No "Watson's Movement 2." Despite habanera peppers swimming their way

through my intestinal tract, I appeared to be unable to create the

usual morning symphony referred to by my next door neighbors as

thunder and lightning.



Knowing that a time of reckoning had to come, yet not sure of just

when, I bravely set off for the market; a local Wal-Mart grocery

store that I often haunt in search of tasty tidbits.



Upon entering the store at first all seemed normal. I selected a cart

and began pushing it about dropping items in for purchase. It wasn't

until I was at the opposite end of the store from the restrooms that

the pain hit me. Oh, don't look at me like you don't know what I'm

talking about. I'm referring to that "Uh oh, gotta go" pain that

always seems to hit us at the wrong time. The thing is, this pain was

different.



The habaneras in the chili from the night before were staging a

revolt. In a mad rush for freedom they bullied their way through the

small intestines, forcing their way into the large intestines, and

before I could take one step in the direction of the restrooms which

would bring sweet relief, it happened. The peppers fired a warning

shot.



There I stood, alone in the spice and baking aisle, suddenly

enveloped in a noxious cloud the likes of which has never before been

recorded. I was afraid to move for fear that more of this vile odor

might escape me. Slowly, oh so slowly, the pressure seemed to leave

the lower part of my body, and I began to move up the aisle and out

of it, just as an elderly woman turned into it.



I don't know what made me do it, but I stopped to see what her

reaction would be to the malodorous effluvium that refused to

dissipate, as she walked into it unsuspecting. Have you ever been

torn in two different directions emotionally? Here's what I mean, and

I'm sure some of you at least will be able to relate.



I could've warned that poor woman but didn't. I simply watched as she

walked into an invisible, and apparently indestructible, wall of odor

so terrible that all she could do before gathering her senses and

running, was to stand there blinking and waving her arms about her

head as though trying to ward off angry bees. This, of course, made

me feel terrible, but then made me laugh. Mistake.



Here's the thing. When you laugh, it's hard to keep things "clamped

down", if you know what I mean. With each new guffaw an explosive

issue burst forth from my nether region. Some were so loud and

echoing that I was later told a few folks in other aisles had ducked,

fearing that someone was robbing the store and firing off a shotgun.



Suddenly things were no longer funny. IT was coming, and I raced off

through the store towards the restrooms, laying down a cloud the

whole way, praying that I'd make it before the grand mal assplosion

took place.



Luck was on my side. Just in the nick of time I got to the john,

began the inevitable "Oh my God", floating above the toilet seat

because my ass is burning SO BAD, purging. One poor fellow walked in

while I was in the middle of what is the true meaning of "Shock and

Awe." He made a gagging sound, and disgustedly said, "Sonofabitch! ",

then quickly left.



Once finished I left the restroom, reacquired my partially filled

cart intending to carry on with my shopping when a store employee

approached me and said, "Sir, you might want to step outside for a

few minutes. It appears some prankster set off a stink bomb in the

store. The manager is going to run the vent fans on high for a minute

or two which ought to take care of the problem."



That of course set me off again, causing residual gases to escape me.

The employee took one sniff, jumped back pulling his shirt up to

cover his nose and, pointing at me in an accusing manner

shouted, "IT'S YOU!", then ran off returning moments later with the

manager. I was unceremoniously escorted from the premises and asked

none too kindly not to return.



Home again without having shopped, I realized that there was nothing

to eat but leftover chili, so I consumed two more bowls. The next day

I went to shop at Albertson's. I can't say anymore about that because

we are in court over the whole matter. Bastards claim they're going

to have to repaint the store..
 

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Lots of funny stuff over the years, but one of the funniest was last year - new years eve I think it was. Brian was selling submersible fish decoys (under a new name of course). Very few saw it because it was only up for about an hour
 
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