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Old 10-27-2007, 07:50 PM   #1
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Default Some funies...

<SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">Respect French Style

When Colin Powell was Sec of State he was being interviewed in <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-comffice:smarttags" /><st1:country-region w:st="on"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">England</st1:country-region><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"> by a group of international reporters when a French reporter asked him: "Does <st1lace w:st="on"><st1:country-region w:st="on">America</st1:country-region></st1lace> expect to retain control of any of the territory you have conquered recently?"
<SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial">
<SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">Powell slowly responded with: "Yes. We will surely retain control of some territory. It will be like the territory we retained in <st1lace w:st="on"><st1:country-region w:st="on">France</st1:country-region></st1lace> after World War II. If you will check you will see that we retained an area of about six feet by three feet for each American lost in <st1lace w:st="on"><st1:country-region w:st="on">France</st1:country-region></st1lace> who is buried there."<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-comfficeffice" /><o></o></DIV><DIV style="MARGIN-BOTTOM: 5pt"><P class=MsoNormal><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">Dead silence.<o></o></DIV></DIV></DIV><DIV style="MARGIN-BOTTOM: 5pt"><P class=MsoNormal><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">_________________________________________
<SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">
Then there was a conference in <st1lace w:st="on"><st1:country-region w:st="on">France</st1:country-region></st1lace> where a number of international engineers were taking part, including French and American. During a break one of the French engineers came back into the room saying "Have you heard the latest dumb stunt Bush has done? He has sent an aircraft carrier to <st1lace w:st="on"><st1:country-region w:st="on">Indonesia</st1:country-region></st1lace> to help the tsunami victims. What does he intend to do, bomb them?"
<SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">
A Boeing engineer stood up and replied quietly:
"Our carriers have three hospitals on board that can treat several hundred people; they are nuclear powered and can supply emergency electrical power to shore facilities; they have three cafeterias with the capacity to feed 3,000 people three meals a day, they can produce several thousand gallons of fresh water from sea water each day, and they carry half a dozen helicopters for use in transporting victims and injured to and from their flight de ck.. We have eleven such ships; how many does <st1lace w:st="on"><st1:country-region w:st="on">France</st1:country-region></st1lace> have?"
<SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt">
<SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">Dead silence.
__________________________________________________ ___

A U.S. Navy Admiral was attending a naval conference that included Admirals from the <st1lace w:st="on"><st1:country-region w:st="on">U.S.</st1:country-region></st1lace>, English, Canadian, Australian and French Navies. At a cocktail reception, he found himself standing with a large group of Officers that included personnel from most of those countries.

Everyone was chatting away in English as they sipped their drinks but a French admiral suddenly complained that, 'whereas Europeans learn many languages, Americans learn only English.' He then asked, 'Why is it that we always have to speak English in these conferences rather than speak French?'

The American Admiral replied 'Maybe it's because the Brits, Canadians, Aussies and Americans arranged it so you wouldn't<SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"> <SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">have to speak German.'<o></o></DIV></DIV><DIV style="MARGIN-BOTTOM: 5pt"><P class=MsoNormal><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt"><o></o></DIV></DIV><DIV style="MARGIN-BOTTOM: 5pt"><P class=MsoNormal><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">Dead silence</DIV></DIV></DIV></DIV>

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Old 10-27-2007, 11:20 PM   #2
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Default RE: Some funies...

/first one is true. Don't know about the second two.

The last one does represent a common European theme against America. They speak multiple languages and will give American toursists a hard time when we dont' know any. At the same time, they don't understand the size of America. Where they can drive through mutliple countries in just a few hours, America can drive for days and still be in the same country.

Will say this, after 9/11 and the uproar France had with us, I worked for a company that was doing work for the French Air Force and several guys went over there to install the system. They said they were constantly being told by the French Air Force airmen thsy they supported us regardless of what was being played out in the press.
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Old 10-27-2007, 11:54 PM   #3
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Default RE: Some funies...

i found that quite funny:clap
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Old 10-28-2007, 06:15 AM   #4
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i like it.:clap
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Old 10-28-2007, 10:18 AM   #5
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Default RE: Some funies...

The last one was awesome!
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Old 10-28-2007, 05:10 PM   #6
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Like it:clap
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Old 10-29-2007, 12:52 AM   #7
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Default RE: Some funies...

How do you say I surrender in French? Oh yeah, I don't know- I'm American...

How many inches are in a meter? Who gives a shit- this is the United States...

America's greatest generation- guys who went there at a young age and fought and died. Period. The state this country is in is due to the fact thatnot enough young menfeel a sense of personal accountability. Get a job, work hard, end of story.

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